OK, I seem to have a lot to say; It was intended to be about the, then currently impending, election in Australia but I think I have been nursing much of it since I first became eligible to vote, in the UK, almost 69 years ago. (We had to be over 21 in those days!)

When I migrated to Australia, 35 years ago, I believed that a new migrant should be damned grateful to be accepted and should shut up, comply with Australian customs and behaviour, and NOT be permitted to vote for at least 10 years. I still think so. I also don’t see why we are permitted to become citizens after only two years. Anyone can fake it for that long; for seven years – Irish Republic – or ten – USA – it’s a bit harder to conceal your unsuitability.

But having been here for 35 years I think it reasonable to offer a few comments on the body politic and how it might be improved. I won’t be around to see it but I’d like my grandkids to have a fair go.

Parties:

Labor – much like the Labour party in the UK – except that they at least could spell. Full of fancy promises that will presumably be paid for out of an inexhaustible supply of money from some fairy godmother. Devoted to forcing those of us who are willing to pull our weight to fund those who are only along for a free ride – or just plain crooks, as we have recently learned.

Liberal – heavily funded by the stinking rich so obviously expected to help them to get richer. If there is one truth in the world it is that the rich are always desperate to get richer. Not enough stinking rich votes, so have to appeal to those expecting to get rich by promising to help them too. Might even have a bit left over for the rest of us but don’t bet on it.

Others – devoted to ’causes’ such as ‘Protecting the Raw Prawn’ and apparently oblivious to the need for all to put in some useful effort for the common good.

All – apt to slough off their responsibilities onto automation – see ‘Robo Debt’ – and erect barriers, at ALL levels of government, to any honest communication with the electors.

Of course, it is surely obvious to everyone that we don’t give our governments time to achieve anything of value. Conversely, our governments consistently fail to advance any useful activities initiated by their predecessors, purely for doctrinaire reasons.

This might be a good place to mention one of my favourite examples of childish pettiness. A very hard working and effective Premier, of a State apparently called Noosouf Wayulls according to the ABC, was peremptorily ejected from office because her boyfriend had used public funds to build a recreational facility in his electorate. This seemed curious to me until I learned that the facility was a Skeet Shooting range. It is of course unimaginable that, had it been a Footy Stadium or, even better, a Cricket Ground, anything far short of Canonisation of the Premier would have resulted.

And then there is that incredible animal the ‘Two Party Preferred’ voting system. If you only want two parties why not simply ban the rest? I intensely dislike the idea of ANY part of my vote being directed to anyone not specifically identified by ME! And the extraordinary panic when some inspired person found a way to exploit it and put some real people into the Senate certainly revealed who the system had been invented to benefit. And it wasn’t US!

One more generality:

A future based upon endlessly digging up – or piping out – finite resources is not something that greatly appeals to me. Do the words ‘Artesian Basin’ suggest anything to you? So although I am greatly in favour of the development of wind and solar sources of power I would like to see a vigorous effort directed to the recovery of valuable substances used in the capture of that power and in the development of devices that are NOT dependent on great use of rare materials. And 65 years ago I spent a significant part of my life making my modest contribution to nuclear power generation in the UK. As far as I am aware, nuclear power has never made any significant contribution to the National Grid in the UK. The Power Station that I worked on apparently functioned without incident for it’s planned 20 years and was then blown up, as intended in the initial plan. I actually watched that on my TV right here in Adelaide. I believe that the identical Station at Tokai Mura in Japan, which I also made some small contribution to, was blown up after the specifed 20 years as well. I have no idea whether either of them produced any significant power in their lifetimes. I don’t think the one at Bradwell ever did much, though it was nice to moor our boat in the warm outflow of its cooling water, in the Blackwater river, when we were having breakfast on a chilly morning. I did some work for the one at Sizewell too but whether it was ever connected to the grid I don’t know.

Well that’s quite enough of that. Now for a few words of guidance for all political parties:

When announcing your various intentions I would like to see the following form of words mandated:

‘From the (enter total amount of money) that we intend to take from YOU in taxes of various forms, after deducting (enter amount for entire parliamentary entourage) for OUR own salaries and expenses and (enter amount) for OUR accommodation, services, transport and other costs, we propose to spend (enter amount) on (enter name of project or activity).’

Then, when the amount raised by taxation (plus any surplus, I laughingly add) proves to be insufficient for the Government’s needs –

‘In addition to (enter total amount) that WE intend to raise by taxing YOU, WE propose to borrow in YOUR name, at a cost of (enter percentage of interest) per annum, over a period of (enter number of years) for which YOU will repay a total of (insert total cost).’

Now a couple of final comments:

The UNIVERSITIES are much given to bragging about the vast funds that they receive in tuition fees from overseas students. There seems to be no reason therefore why those same universities should not be obliged to provide adequate, suitable accommodation for the number of students that they accept. They could presumably even make a profit from that! (AREN’T THEY SUPPOSED TO BE RUN BY CLEVER PEOPLE? Saying that they are not in the business of providing accommodation is rubbish. If they are not, who else ought to be providing it for them to profit by?
After all, renting out accommodation would surely give a better return on their excess tuition fees than the Stock exchange, with no risk at all.

HOUSING. Initiatives such as removing stamp duty, although certainly desirable in themselves, will only result in the price increasing by that amount. House prices are entirely a matter of supply and demand and have always, in my lifetime, been just outside what anyone could sensibly afford to pay. I first bought the worst house in Greater London with the aid of a loan from my company pension scheme, spent every penny I could scrape up on repairing and refurbishing it, and went on to do the same on my next two houses until I could afford a new (mortgaged) one. When I migrated I still needed a mortgage for my new home in South Australia, and it cost me 17.5%. interest. (That is not a misprint.) The house I live in now is almost paid for. And if I live for another 6 weeks I will be 90 years old. Almost as old as the house. In all my time nothing has changed in housing affordability.

I would like it to be easier for young people to buy their own homes but their problem is not exactly new.

Since I wrote the preceding words we have had an election. Although I am alarmed at the potential lunacies of which the nation’s chosen leaders are capable, it is pretty obvious that the only practical alternative is even more dysfunctional than it appeared at the time. A very good reason for NOT trying to restrict our choice to one out of but two parties.

(6 weeks later – ‘MADE IT!’)