A Child’s (or Politician’s) Guide to eliminating, or at least curbing, the rorting of customers by ‘financial institutions’ – or indeed by anyone else.

1. Create a database to contain details of every reported rort.

2. Publicise the existence of the database and it’s purpose.

3. Create an app, so that people can easily lodge the details of how they have been rorted.

4. Provide an address and phone number for less savvy people to use.

5. Employ a trained, energetic and intelligent staff to investigate ALL reports thoroughly.

6. Prosecute in ALL cases where there has clearly been rorting.

7. Pay for all of this by MASSIVE fines on rorters – not on companies; not on institutions; on individuals responsible for the rorts and paricularly on individual managers who apply pressure on their staffs to obtain sales ‘at all costs’.

I was inspired to write that by reports of the outcome of the recent Royal Commission, which stated that ‘The Banks’ will be required to pay vast sums to pay for armies of lawyers to be engaged in the prosecution – and no doubt defence – of….Well that is where it gets fuzzy. ‘The Banks’ themselves? ‘Banks’ don’t make decisions; people make decisions. ‘Banks’ don’t pressure employees; people in banks apply that pressure. And now we hear of mobile phone company employees persuading people to sign up for commitments that they can’t possibly meet and who in some cases are already hopelessly in debt. Someone in those companies is making a mint and it isn’t the poor bloody salesman. Find them and TAKE AWAY THEIR MONEY. ALL OF IT, in extreme cases and a great deal in lesser ones.

Now let’s move on.

As elections approach ‘Pork Barrels’ of increasing size and variety are appearing. “We are going to spend (insert stupidly large amount) on giving you…’ Note; They are going to give Us.

But ‘They’ don’t have that much money and wouldn’t spend it on anyone but themselves if they had.

I am not a fan of ‘political correctness’ in its usual context of having to hide your perfectly valid opinion or feelings behind some mealy-mouthed drivel to avoid offending people who can tolerate no-one’s opinions but their own. However, correct use of language by politicians would be refreshing. eg.

‘We will be taking umpty-squillions of dollars from you in taxes to spend partly on providing this dubious and ill-defined ‘benefit’ but mostly to grease the palms of our family and associates.’ (And a lot of lawyers, of course.)

Now I know that some of you (if there are more than one of you) will feel this to be extreme. But the plain truth is that ALL of the money that politicians spend IS collected from us in the first place and if they ARE in fact spending – or proposing to spend – some of it in a way that might benefit us IT IS NO MORE THAN WHAT THEY ARE BEING PAID HANDSOMELY TO DO.

The fact that they expect us to be delighted by this should make us at least curious about the vast other sums that they collect and spend in ways most UNLIKELY to earn our delight. In fact I can see no reason why the government should not be required to publish its balance sheet – nailed to a post in the Internet perhaps – for us, the owners, to examine. Yes, however inept, bovine or plain dishonest they may be they are OUR government – wholly owned and PAID FOR by us. And it’s about time we made that clear.